Saturday, May 30, 2009

Spoiler post: Why T4 sucks!

Ok, here it is - the much awaited "T4 Spoiler post" by public demand!*
*(read public = CP)

Read a few reviews praising the movie on IMDB.
Fail to understand how anyone can give this lousy movie a rating of 10 - It can happen only if they have not seen ANY of the movies that T4 has been "inspired" from.
(the count presently stands at 13 movies!)
Fail to understand how a Terminator movie was beaten by "Night at the museum" and still had a 7.4 rating on IMDB.
Fail to understand why of all the reviews written on the movie, none have been scathing of the movie and are trying to play down the lousiness of the movie. The most honest review was one that said "Ben Stiller finishes off Terminator Salvation". Why? Because it presented box office collections for the long weekend.

T4 - 53.8 Million
Night at the museum starring Ben Stiller - 70 Million!

Numbers don't lie. You cannot mellow them down like reviews written by paid scribes!

Here are reasons why T4 sucked and a few suggestions to make it better!

1. The 1st hour of the movie is just building up the plot.

2. The 2nd hour tries to show all the cool action that you have watched in the trailers! By then you are too bored to find it cool, especially if the trailers are in HD!

3. The people in the movie appear well groomed - not helpless and desolate (as they should be in a post-nuclear world)

4. The machines are collecting people to take them to a facility and then kill them. Why? Are you going to harvest them for making nuclear batteries?

5. Just use the robotic arm for picking up the people to crush them! Its more efficient instead of transporting them to a shed and THEN killing them!

6. (7.) In fact, why use the arm at all? Why not just carpet bomb the world and kill everyone.

7. (8.) Whats the use of killing ALL the people? Or even capturing them? Were the machines just trying to find something to keep themselves busy? -

"Gee, we built so many extra nuclear batteries. We'll have to build some terminators to use them now."
"Gee, now there are extra Terminators, so lets kill some people even though they are not much of a resistance!" groovy! (FYI, that's what Bush did in Iraq. Its not the future, its the past!)

8. (6.) In the beginning of the movie, John Connor looks at a nuclear blast happen and survives without even getting a pimple on his ass.

9. (7.) You cannot kill a terminator by shooting it with a gun! Its stupid! The bullets will just bounce off!

10. (8.) Once the gun is empty, you cannot throw it at the Terminator and say "die!" - No, that will not kill it either, unless you are trying to kill it with your stupidity!

11. (9.) When you see a 30 foot "Transformer type" robot coming at you, you should know you cannot outrun it in a pickup truck!

12.(10.) The "predator" in the Arnold movie was a better killing machine than the Terminators!

13. (11.) The bat-man like bike dispatched from the robot's leg was not meant to be ridden by a human!

14 (12.) When there is a nuclear blast, you cannot communicate on radio!

15. (13.) You cannot blow up a nuclear battery plant and possibly escape in a helicopter! You will die!

16. (14.) The nuclear battery plant - the source of the terminator fuel - had minimal security! Even some banks these days have lasers to guard their facility!

17. (15.) If the terminators are heat proof, why not have a "heat-moat" around the plant that will kill humans, but allow the terminators to move in and out!

18. (16.) After killing all the humans, what will Skynet do? Grow potatoes? Or try to create a Issac Asimov inspired SIMS world by building fornicating robots!

19. (17.) The human-robot removes a computer chip from his brain and survives without a hitch! Did he run a test to check if the chip - embedded in his brain - was not vital for his survival? ha!

20. (18.) The same human-robot throws a chair at the display screen thru which Skynet communicated with him - even I know that not going to kill Skynet! Whats the point in that? Just run and save John without trying to reason with an AI computer that has almost succeeded in destroying the world!

21. (19.) If you are going to argue with Skynet, at least make sure you have some logic that would throw it into an endless recursive loop that will lock it up!

22. (20.) He could have installed Windows Vista on the computer - That would have caused it to crash every 30 minutes!

23. (21.) The patches required by Vista would cause Skynet to reboot twice every week. The humans can use that time to infiltrate and capture Skynet!

24. (22.) Putting charcoal over an airbrushed actor does not create an authentic desolate look! Try to get some make inspiration from Mad-Max if you have borrowed a few scenes from it!

25. (23.) The transformer type robot in point 9 raised the count of "Inspired movies" to 14!

26. (24.) Considering all the above points, this post should be called "your ticket money saving post!"

27. (25.) Add your own reason here!

28. A post-nuclear war world does not have a blue sky when nuclear explosions are still happening.

Thursday, May 28, 2009


Why do people cheat? Isn't one person enough?

The 1st Affair:

A married man was having an affair with his secretary.

One day they went her place and made love all afternoon. Exhausted, they fell
asleep and woke up at 8 PM.

The man hurriedly dressed and told his lover to take his shoes outside and rub
them in the grass and dirt.

He put on his shoes and drove home.

"Where have you been?" his wife demanded.

"I can't lie to you," he replied, "I'm having an affair with my secretary. We had
sex all afternoon."

"You lying bastard!

You've been playing golf!"

And its not just limited to men! A recent study in found that Australian women are as equally interested in an orgy as men! That may not necessarily mean its cheating though...

The 2nd Affair:

A middle-aged couple had two beautiful daughters but always talked about having a

They decided to try one last time for the son they always wanted.

The wife got pregnant and delivered a healthy baby boy.

The joyful father rushed to the nursery to see his new son.

He was horrified at the ugliest child he had ever seen.

He told his wife, "There's no way I can be the father of this baby. Look at the
two beautiful daughters I fathered! Have you been fooling around behind my back?"

The wife smiled sweetly and replied, "Not this time!"

If we know that one spouse can get boring, is ok to deliberately wander every so often? We don't eat the same food everyday because it is boring...

The 3rd Affair:

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front

"Hurry," she said, "stand in the corner."

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.

"Don't move until I tell you," she said. "Pretend you're a statue."

"What's this?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.

"Oh it's a statue." she replied. "The Smith's bought one and I liked it so much I
got one for us, too."

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen and returned with a sandwich
and a beer.

"Here," he said to the statue, "have this. I stood like that for two days at the
Smith's and nobody offered me a damned thing."

Is vengeance the right answer?

The 4th Affair:

A man walked into a cafe, went to the bar and ordered a beer.

"Certainly, Sir, that'll be one cent."

"One Cent?" the man thought.

He glanced at the menu and asked, "How much for a nice juicy steak and a bottle
of wine?"

"A nickel," the barman replied.

"A nickel?" exclaimed the man. "Where's the guy who owns this place?"

The bartender replied, "Upstairs, with my wife."

The man asked, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?"

The bartender replied,

"The same thing I'm doing to his business down here."

Or is homicidal vengeance the answer?

The 5th Affair:

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.

He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess."

"There's no need to," his wife replied.

"No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best
friend, her best friend, and your mother!"

"I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."

Why do some people cheat? Is it because they are hurt by others? Is it ok to cheat if you have been cheated on? or should one just curse their luck and move on...

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

!~~~ Hell or heaven for comic fans? ~~~!

I love watching cartoons - I generally prefer the animated variety, but sometimes the ones in real life provide much more entertainment

When a movie on a superhero is made, the obvious audience would be the people who have read the storybook / comic book. But very few superhero movies do ’real’ justice to their fans. The most common ’sin’ committed - if I may use the word - is to chop off parts of the story - or to twist some facts to suit the director. If the story is intact, the animation isn’t surreal because it is ’too detailed’ for the big screen - all this is done in the name of ’appealing’ to the movie going audience.

This is such a downer because while making the movie, they forget one important thing - the target ’audience’ for superhero movies is people who like reading the comic books - it is people who like the attention to details. In ordinary words - they are ’nerds’ like me !

So how does Hellboy fare in my exacting standards? Read on people...... read on !

First things first - I have to confess that I have not read the ’Hellboy’ comic book, but I have read enough comic books to know comic books. And knowing comic books is vital to review a super hero movie because the ’nerd’ in me knows what to look out for in such a movie.

It is the final days
of World War II, the Germans and Russians combine modern science and ancient evil and build a machine to open a portal to the ’other’ world to bring forth the destruction of Earth. Ofcourse, if we have Russians and Germans colluding, the Americans can’t be far behind now, can they! The movie opens with a battalion of U.S. soldiers and a scientist/professor traveling together to thwart the evil plan of their enemies. Professor Trevor Bruttenholm, who is the American expert on magic and sorcery is at first mocked by the US military who think all this is just mumbo-jumbo. However as they reach the Island in Scotland that houses the device, the young professor is shocked to see Grigori Rasputin. His presence signifies something even more big than what he had anticipated.

Grigori Rasputin is a Russian mystic who plans awaken the Ogdru Jahad - The Seven monstrous Gods of Chaos. Helping him are his aides Ilsa von Haupstein and Karl Ruprecht Kroenen. Karl is a much touted killer in Hitler’s military! This man is seemingly invincible and many attempts to kill him, including shooting him in the head, have been futile. Just before operating the machine, Ilsa is made immortal with everlasting youth and beauty by Rasputin in exchange for eternal servitude.

When the machine starts, the Americans soldiers are awestuck by the spectacle that they witness. Not realising the gravity of the situation, they start whispering and they are found out. A fight erupts just when Rasputin starts to open the portal to the other world!
What will happen next?

Will the Americans be able to save the destruction of the Earth at the hands of the evil Rasputin? or will Rasputin succeed in his scheme and be able to awaken the Ogdru Jahad? Does Rasputin have any other vested plans? Who is Karl Ruprecht Kroenen? Is he really invincible? Who is Hellboy and how does he figure in this scheme of things? Watch this movie to know the answers....

What I loved about this movie is that Mexican director Guillermo del Toro has done complete justice to the Dark Horse Comic book - Hellboy: Seed of Destruction by Mike Mignola.

What I didn’t like about the movie?
I didn’t like the attempts of the central character at humor and wit ! He is like that guy who tries too much to get the girl of his dreams that his wheels are spinning in place - he generates a lot of smoke without any fire - those of you who have seen the movie will know what I’m talking about... the rest can remember these lines and try to recollect them when they do see the movie :-)

Clearly if every guy in hell has the wit and charm like the hero of our book/movie, I’d say the girls who like guys should start being good - they certainly don’t wanna go to hell, bcoz they’d be bored out of their wits! But then its hell - maybe that is God’s way of punishing them evil girls :D

Why am I recommending a movie whose central character lacks suave? Read the next para !!

The feel that one gets while enjoying the comic book like reading the dialogs in the voice bubbles, reading the narration written at the top to enhance the description of the scene, the various shadows cast by the animators to create suspense and fear, the elaborate attention to various minute details in the plot that the reader can see after reading the comic umpteen number of times, the rich feel of the vibrant colours in the book, various characters like a group of policemen - some big and burly while others a little old with a family background (the ones you feel sad when they are killed), the gruesome creatures that make you cringe and wonder - Can the superhero survive this fearsome invincible thing?

All of these aspects - that make a good comic book have been authentically recreated in the movie without any compromise. I felt like I am reading a comic book on the screen !! For this satiating experience to the nerd in me, I give the director and the animators 10/10 !
If you worship comics and want to see justice being done to your religion, don’t miss this movie !

An important point to note is that none of the actors are well-known celebs. For comic based movies, getting big names in quite unnecessary because besides the actors being covered in a veil of costumes and makeup, the story is the main hero. Almost all the actors in the movie have a biography of similar movies. Full points to Jeremy Zimmermann for casting aptly.

The Art direction in the movie is A+ as are the costumes. It is due to this that the authentic comic book feel has been successfully retained. Full points to Marco Bittner Rosser, Peter Francis and James Hambidge for the Art and to Wendy Partridge for the Costumes.

For a list of complete cast, please see

The movie won the 2004 Best Director - Feature Film - Imagen Award and the 2005 Saturn Award for
Best Make-Up. Both were well deserved, IMO.
For other nominations please visit

my verdict?

For the average movie audience it is a 3 star movie. For someone big on comic books, it is a 4 star movie. For someone who loved to see justice being done to comics in movies, it is a 5 star movie !!
You know who you are...

!! Spike !!

This review was first published here by me.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Quickie reviews

Antarmahal (2008) - * * * * * - A Bengali movie by Rituparno Ghosh about ancient superstitions and how they are twisted... Bengali directors are simply awesome. The region has immense talent and art! Not to forget, beauties too! This movie is set in 1878 and is about a landlord (Shroff) who desires a child. He marries a young bride (Soha) while his 1st wife is still with hi (Rupa Ganguly). The two women share a bond amidst the insecurities and yet they have this sisterly bond between them. The story is told from different POVs at times and is simply brilliant in some moments! Bachchan plays a sculptor who is to make an idol of Goddeess Durga. The landlord wants him to put the Queen's face on the idol to earn a title from the Empire and grow his power. The movie handles various topics like lust, power, marital rape, childlessness, polygamy, superstitions, vain kings, dis-loyalty, seduction. To watch such strong, bold, controversial cinema made at home was quite a shock for me. I was mighty impressed by the director and his handling of such a myriad of emotions with elan in this 2 hour movie! Classic!

A man and a woman (1966) - * * * - A story of a divorced model/actress and a widower race car driver. Their kids go to the same school and they both meet. The romance shown is very innocent and classy. The movie sometimes uses black and white to nice effect and also makes ample use of facial expressions to convey the romantic connection between the woman and the man. It also has an unexpected twist in the end... A nice romantic movie to watch when you have nothing to do but get your mush on! The man is played by Jean-Louis Trintrignant and the woman is played by Anouk Aimee. Direction is by Claude Lelouch. Classy romance.

Tadpole - * * 1/2 - Just what is it about the older woman that boys find attractive? Is it the intelligence, the full bodied figure, the commanding attitude, the understanding motherly way in which they act? The young boy (John Ritter) in the movie falls in love with his french step-mom (Sigourney Weaver). Only she doesn't know it yet. His mature demeanor and suave ways makes him irresistible to girls. The story takes a turn when he gets drunk and unwittingly sleeps with his step-mom's best friend (Bebe Neuwirth) because she was wearing his step-mom's scarf. The boy now jumps thru hoops in an effort to conceal what happened and this presents various funny moments in the movie. Rom-Com.

PS: Post style inspired by Vee's latest!

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Roller Coasters!

Yesterday was fun - I discovered myself actually peaking while having fun. It was different from the other times because usually I go from 0 to 100% in no time when it comes to doing such things! Yesterday was different because it took me a good 8 hours before I started enjoying the roller coasters in the park! 8 hours! Can you imagine that?

Now before the smart asses start getting ideas about me turning older, etc, etc and invoke my wrath upon them - let me clarify, it was because of food! I ate too much and the drive to the park did not leave enough time for the food to settle down. Not the one to waste time, I jumped on the "Son of Beast" as soon as I entered the park and really "felt" the effects when the ride was over. I decided to take it slow and give myself some time to chill before I hit other really good coasters.

Thanks to new friends and old, a few hours were spent talking to them! Good conversations from the heart even though I was speaking to some after ages... picked up right where we had left off and the fun, flirt and leg-pulling started! Amazing how you can love certain ones while actually hurling abuses at them... marvelous joy! Cheers to such friendship!

A few conversations and a coke later, the spirits were lifted... - Coca Cola, an amazing dark bubbly liquid - what a business idea. BTW, do you know, the formula for making coke is known to only 3 people in the whole world. The other 2 cannot travel in the same airplane and they both have a key to the safe in which it is stored! And now, just because you are a loyal readers of my blog, you will know it too...
So ladies and gentlemen and whoever-you-are ... Here it the formula for Coke - the best selling soft drink in the world!

water + color + CO2 + addiction = handsome profit!

Genius! I do realize, this actually makes me an addict and also a fool, but hey, it makes me feel great! And if it makes you feel good, it has to be good for you, right? RIGHT! (I know the effects - so spare the wise comments about how its good for cleaning toilets and such... I have read that forwarded email already)

Now where were we? Ah yes, coasters! Amazing creations of steel, wood and concrete! They give such an adrenaline rush while keeping the rider in a safe and controlled environment!

Frankly, "Son of Beast", with its shaking wooden frame, harsh ride and the steep drop, provided more excitement than the newest addition - diamondback.

So which is the best coaster in the park? According to me, it has to be "Firehawk".
It makes you feel you are hanging in mid-air held and gives you the feeling of flying in the air! I thoroughly enjoyed riding it - twice!

Unfortunately for me, "The Beast" was closed, so missed out 1 coaster - that should be reason enough to visit the park again!

The park is called Kings Island and it has many Nickelodeon based attractions for kids and it also has many water rides. The water rides I plan to check out in my next trip whenever it happens.

Some free survival tips while visiting an adventure park -
1. Never eat too much food. It'll make you queasy. If you have to eat, do it in moderate quantities and have east food like fries, chips, etc. A 7 course meal and coaster do not match!
2. Water is your friend. Stay hydrated at all times. Often times its not the ride that will wring your guts out - its dehydration. Spot the signs.... If you are not sweating like a pig when its warm outside, its not the new anti-perspirant you are wearing - you are just dehydrated!
3. Dress for the occasion - water parks + bikini/swimming trunks = fun! - for everyone ;-) A spare set of clothes would come in handy after the water rides.
4. Hot sun - Sun block = dark burnt skin
5. Travel light. Some rides can be topsy-turvy, so its better not to carry a $500 cell-phone with you. Laptops are a strict no-no ... unless you have a girlfriend by that name (That was for guys and open minded girls reading this blog)
6. Carry a camera to capture the moments, but try not to make the curvy blond in the skimpy bikini the sole objective of your trip! She may have a tattoo sporting boyfriend watching you while you watch her!!
7. Makes friends with the boyfriend first and click the blondie snaps later!
8. Why are you still looking for more tips? This is not a project for God's sake! Go and be yourself, the point is to have fun.

So folks, do you like roller coasters or are you the ones who cannot handle them? or do you need to be called chicken before you hop on to one to prove the person wrong? Are you an adrenaline junkie too?

PS: Does any one have the video of Aakash and Shalini in Dil chata hai where he calls her a chicken before she hops on to the coaster?

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Movie Review: Terminator Salvation

Movie review: Terminator Salvation (2009)

Sacrifice lunch hour to book tickets.
Build up hype to watch it FDFS.
Spend evening trying to sleep.
Make the mistake of turning on the television!
Catch "Pirates of Caribbean" and "Take the lead" on TV.
Lose sleep.
Catch the movie at 12:01 am. FDFS!
Come back disappointed.

The 1st half of the movie is spent in building up the premise of the story. The 2nd half is where all the action is.

The scenes in the movie will remind you of -
1. Black Hawk Down
2. Matrix
3. Matrix:Reloaded
4. Mad Max - Road warrior
5. Crank 2
6. Death Race
7. T2
8. I am Legend
9. Doomsday
10. T3
11. Dark Knight

T4 is a mish-mash of all these movies with some original "spice" thrown into it. The mix does not work for these reasons.
1. I have seen all these movies - just this year. I did not want a refresher course!
2. In this month alone, there were 3 other movies released - "X-Men Origins: Wolverine", "Star Trek", "Angels & Demons" - All were better than T4, even Wolverine, and I did not like wolverine that much!
3. I have not even watched "Angels & Demons" yet
4. I thought T3 was a bad movie
5. The music in some places felt like it was from a Hindi movie (Zanjeer is the one that came to mind)
6. Unlike Star Trek, no one clapped in joy when the movie ended (Star trek still got claps 3 weeks after its release!)

The movie evoked the similar feelings as watching Matrix Reloaded. The action was good, but the story was weak. It felt like this movie should have been an "in-between" movie. Like Matrix Reloaded, its too weak to stand on its own. And since Matrix reloaded was released years ago, this one was highly unoriginal even in its action. Come on man! Its a T4 movie. Try to show something original.

Seems like to me, the movie was made to cater to video game fans! Did someone in marketing forget, the movie has to be a hit for the other franchise to be successful? The plot is full of gaping loopholes! The action is barely passable. This one fits in the category of movies where all the cool scenes are already shown in the trailer.

The 1st half stands on a rating of 5/10. The second half stands at 6/10. This brings the avg rating to 5.5/10.
Disappointing for any movie.
For a T4 movie, that's very disappointing! Especially when you stay up in the middle of the work week to watch it. I know, you will still want to watch it and judge for yourself. Be my guest. I'll wait for you at the "frustrated fan party" right here! remember, there are no refunds! You are warned. No salvation in this movie!

Some of the trailers look good - Eagerly awaited movies are - Surrogates (Bruce Willis), Sherlock Holmes (Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law (i think)) {One has to find solace in something, right? We all live on hope after all!}

Friday, May 15, 2009

Kitchen tales of a bachelor - How to start an oil fire!

1. Take a pan and pour some oil in it
2. Put it on a flame
3. As the gas takes time to heat the oil, you cool off with a chilled beer
4. Since cold beer does not go with hot kitchen, retire in bedroom
5. You have lots of work to do later that involves cooking! Pop in a movie dvd to relax
6. Get engrossed in movie and fall asleep
(In the mean time, the hot oil has started smoking and managed to catch fire)
7. Wake up when the smoke alarm goes off
8. Call friend on phone to ask what is this buzzing noise and why wont it stop
9. On finally noticing the smoke, run into the kitchen
10. Take the hot flaming pan of oil - which by now has burnt half of the microwave - and place it on the kitchen floor
11. Leave a burnt mark in the kitchen floor with this brilliant maneuver, so perfectly round, it'll make your geometry teacher proud and your apartment owner really mad.
[Its just a parting gift for him to remember you by :-) ]
12. Blame friends for leaving cold beer in the house that almost caused the building to burn down!
13. Open another beer to relieve you from the stress you just had to undergo
14. Finish off all cold beer in the house to prevent another fire

The next lesson will be on how to kill the colluding cooker - be on time for the lesson and bring your own beer!

PS: Post inspired by THIS article by Abha!

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Why is your blog named thus?

One of my friends had an innovative blog name in her erstwhile blog. I liked the way "eye" was used in place of an "I". So, like Anu Malik, I was "inspired" by that and named my blog eye in sty in... which if pronounced together spells Einstein. Also, And this is where things get interesting, so hold on to the seat of your pants.... if you take the 1st letters of each word in the blog, it spells EISI also means I-See... See? How bright can I be at times!

I told you the secret of my blog name, now whats the story behind yours?

PS: post inspired by another friend.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Movie Review: X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009)

Admit it! There is something special about those Adamantium claws that make it really attractive for people of both the sexes, even if it is for different reasons! Right?

If there was one character from X-men that people just didn't get enough of, it has to be Wolverine! Complex, deep, disturbed, torn he was the one who gave the vibe of being on or near the edge! A little more bad and he could easily be on the other side! This edge is what warrants wolverine his own movie!

The movie was already part of a controversy, even before it was released. Rumor had it that it was already leaked online before it was released in the theaters. Fox had to send out memos in the news print to assure the audiences that the "leaked" movie was very different from what will be shown in the theaters. Of course, once the news became public, websites were leery of carrying the movie in fear of a lawsuit!

Not to sound disappointing, but the movie plot did not have enough in it to make it REALLY enjoyable for me. Perhaps I was expecting to see the antics of Wolverine himself, but was surprised by seeing other mutants in the movie. Or perhaps it was that some of the other mutants were a little bit too cool for wolverine! Or perhaps it was that wolverine's brother, the sabertooth mutant had similar powers. Or perhaps there was not one single villain in the movie and he was not that powerful, just cunning? Ok, I'll go with the last excuse.
Having got that out of the way, now I can focus on the positives of the movie.
The one thing worth mentioning is that the action in the movie is really slick! I totally loved it when they slowed down the scene to make it look more exciting than it really is.
Also have to admit that the character of Silverfox (Lynn Collins) kinda grew on me. The director really built that suspense quite well in the movie. Totally believable. Being full bodied (read not skinny), she kinda looks hot! I like her ;-)

Liev Schreiber plays Victor Creed / Sabertooth. He is Logan's brother, with retractable nails instead of knuckle-claws. He has elongated canine teeth that make him look like a badly developed vampire/werewolf. Kinda silly actually!

Danny Houston plays Stryker - cunning to the core, he is quite intelligent. But then,I feel it does not take much intelligence to fool a gullible and confused wolverine, just guts. And Stryker may be cunning, but he does not display the same level of cool cunning as displayed by Magneto in the X-men series.
I liked the character of John Wraith played by Will.I.Am. A mutant, his powers are pretty cool. His character had a slight Morpheus-like feel to it and I liked Morpheus's character much in Matrix.
Other cool mutants in the movie are blob , Gambit, Agent Zero, Deadpool, Bolt. Scott's character was quite weak. Weapon XI was kinda ugly and looked unbeatable, and yet, was easily destroyed.

The character that needs no introduction is, of course, wolverine. Even though the plot is kind of shallow, his character has the maximum screen presence. However, the movie fails to develop an emotional attachment towards its main character. One does not quite feel for the character as he goes through enduring various events in the movie. Perhaps the gruff exterior of the character dis-allows for an emotional connect? Somehow, it didn't quite work for me.

In spite of the negatives, the movie is still very good for a single watch. I also have a feeling that the video game is going to be quite a hit with the fans of the series. Director Gavin Hood has made a decent attempt at the movie, the action being the highlight in the movie. Also, there is enough oh Hugh Jackman in the movie for the ladies to ogle :-) This should make it easy for guys to drag their gals to watch the movie. Just throw in the words "bare chest" and "Hugh Jackman" at 'em and surprise surprise, they might even get ready before you :-)

I give the movie 6.5 / 10 for its slick action, the other mutants and a weakish plot. Enjoyable fare this one is.

This revu is dedicated to Mumble - who does not have a link to his blog on his profile! Can you please update it buddy? We'd like to read what you have to write...

PS: This started out as a double feature, but the Star Trek review got the better of me as I started penning it... Sorry to have made you endure me twice :-)

Movie Review: Star Trek (2009)

When any thing has a cult following, the subject has to be dealt with great care. The director has to not only satisfy the audience, he has to be careful so as to NOT offend the existing fans and he has to do it while showing something "new" to them. When the movie is Star Trek, the burden on the director increases by manifold as many of the fans will pick and discuss each and every minutest thing in great detail. Everything has to be logically perfect and yet it must be cool! If done right, it will easily make such a movie the biggest movie of this weekend! If done wrong, it can easily make it a big flop.

The thing that I liked about watching this particular Star Trek movie is that the movie has a "new movie" feel about it. Its kind of like the "new car" smell you experience in a new car. The tag line of the movie says "The future is here" and the movie lives up to its tag line. The visuals in the movie are very fresh and clean. The surroundings in the spaceship appear to be new and futuristic. You do not get the feeling of "Hey, That thing reminds me of that other movie. Or This scene feels like its from the Matrix."

The new Captain Kirk, played by Chris Pine has been given a "I care a damn" attitude in the movie. Something that is different from the old Captain Kirk that I was used to after watching the television series. Although it is this particular quirk about the movie that might make me want to watch the movie again and therefore it actually works to the movie's advantage if others want to do the same!

Spock! With his odd eyebrows and his seemingly indestructible strength and his high level of intelligence combined with his famous hand-on-the-jugular-maneuver that can instantly render the opposition unconscious, it is but logical it was this character in the Star Trek series that I always wanted to be! Although, I must say that the character played in this movie was not as aspiring, it is perhaps the length of the series that made the Spock of the series way way cooler (its logical, isn't it!)! Played by Zachary Quinto, the Spock of the movie is also cool as he retains all the qualities of the (dare-i-say) original Spock!

Hikaru Sulu is played by John Cho. (the biography of this character is quite interesting.) The reliable helmsman of the most famous star ship in the world! The character in the movie is vulnerable, yet solid enough to feel at home in the Enterprise!

"Beam me up, Scotty!" - Perhaps the most famous dialogue in the era of Star Trek! Played by Simon Pegg, this character is the practical scientist. A little eccentric, but full of ingenuity. In this movie he has a relatively small yet memorable role.

Dr. McCoy. The ship's chief medical officer and a personal friend of James T Kirk. Played by Karl Urban, Dr. McCoy smuggles a renegade Kirk aboard the Enterprise in the movie (revealed only because this is not vital to the plot) and also serves as a bit of a comic relief.

Uhura is the ship's communication officer. Her character is played by Zoe Saldana. Oddly, I thought she was being played by Beyonce in the movie. Logically speaking, the mistake was made by me because Beyonce also had a movie coming out around the same time and there was quite a bit of a resemblance although I did think that the character made Beyonce look skinnier and a little - for the lack of a better word - ugly! I found her bio data quite impressive and her looks unattractive! She has a memorable screen presence in the movie and also serves as a corner of a love angle in the movie.

Of course, as it goes with any action movie, the movie will only be as good as its villain. And the visuals apart, this is perhaps the strongest point in the movie for Nero is real "bad" villain who manages to strike fear in your heart! Ruthless, cold-blooded, calculative, scheming, cunning - he makes bad look cool! Played by Eric Bana, I really liked his characterization a lot even though there is not much time devoted to building it. That may be one of the reasons why I ended up liking his character, because unlike Captain Kirk, the director did not waste any screen time in developing this character. It just unfolded as the story progressed! Efficiently ruthless!
The plot of the movie is simple and yet its complex enough to warrant for a second viewing. There is enough "nerdy details" for a Trekkie to discuss over a few cold beers! Like the creation of an alternate parallel universe caused by the altering of the past by knowledge from the future! A good thing to cause an argument and then discuss "what could have happened" by buying the DVD of the movie.

The only quirk that I had was - even though the cast was international, at least in terms of race, once again the action was centered around the US! It gets a little repetitive to time and again see movie makers show - the world = US - in movies! makes me want to be a little crass and say "Come on - get your head out of your ass! There are other continents too. Its OK to go a little more international. The whole world is a market place now and its for yours to take!" There are other things that I want to discuss too, but it will mean revealing a bit of the plot and hence I refrain for now. And since I have digressed, here is a treat for you...

A visual compa rision of the Old v/s new
Star ship... just for kicks :-) Note that the new star ship is shiner! Also note that many more stars are now visible as this is the age od High Definition :-))
The commendable thing about this Star Trek movie is that the director J.J. Abrams has managed to give it a fresh feel while retaining the original Star Trek flavour in it. I can see it winning awards or at least posing serious competition to the other eagerly awaited flick of this year - T4!
Go watch it! The ship is really cool, the characters are exciting and funny, the action is also cool and the plot is deep. This movie has enough in it to make a Trekkie out of you! And if you do not get converted in the first screening, we'll make sure to get a vulcan sign out of you the second time around :-)) 7.5/10 is my rating! Its really good!

This revu is dedicated to Mumble - who does not have a link to his blog on his profile! Can you please update it buddy? We'd like to read what you have to write...
PS: This started out as a double feature, but the review got the better of me as I started penning it... Sorry to have made you endure me twice :-)

Saturday, May 9, 2009

2009 Spanish GP qualifying, T4 and some funny clips

Did anyone else watch the qualifying for the Spanish GP? For the first time this season I felt that red car found its groove! As the Ferrari aggressively turned the corners on the Spanish track, one could tell the car was a serious contender this time! I did not know at that time who was the driver - it could either be Filipe Massa who found his "mad-streak" yet again or it could be Kimi Raikkonen who had to undergo yet another bowel movement and thus was driving fast to get to the loo! To my delight, it was Massa who was able to break into the top 4 slots in qualifying that were almost sealed by the Brawn GP and Red Bull cars.

The best part was the red car was not running light either! Does it mean that my favourite team is back in contention? Has the season officially begun at Ferrari then? Perhaps the wake up call came when they were seen battling a Force India car for position in the previous race in Bahrain! What remains to be seen is if this is a fluke or a reality? The car weight suggests its could be a reality as Massa is the heaviest of all the top 6 qualifiers! I cant wait to find out in the next 10.5 hours as the Spanish GP begins!

Pos., Driver, team, Qualifying weight of car
1. Jenson Button, Brawn GP, 646kg
2. Sebastian Vettel, Red Bull, 651.5
3. Rubens Barrichello, Brawn GP, 649.5
4. Felipe Massa, Ferrari, 655
5. Mark Webber, Red Bull, 651.5
6. Timo Glock, Toyota, 646.5

The Brawn GP team is sporting the Terminator Salvation livery on their cars to promote the 4Th movie in the franchise! Have you watched the previews? Aren't they just awesome? I cannot wait for T4 to be released on May 21!

Raikkonen's bowel movement moment !

This clip has a better, cleaner and funnier foot-in-mouth situation !

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Movie Review: Race (2007)

Lets say that there is a race. The important emelents of a race are the drivers and cars, right? While that may be true, the race track too provides a big part of the entertainment. A good racetrack should have a blend of straights and twists. Too much straights and the cars just zoom past the audience... Too many twists and there is not enough thrill of speed. The right blend of straights and twists and you get a good racetrack that provides good entertainment. In a movie, the racetrack is the story.

The story in Race just has too many twists to pick pace... The viewer kind of feels like get a serving of noodles after being promised jalebis! The good thing is that the twists in the plot are spread well apart but the comedy is just horrendous! Instead of giving relief to the audience and allowing them to digest the twists, it adds to the headache and makes one cringe at the pathetic humor. With Akshaye Khanna cracking SMS jokes about alcohol being a slow killer while being drunk... to Anil Kapoor giving sexual "hints" to his secy using fruits as a metaphor in "not so subtle" dialogues that dont make you laugh most of the time. At one point, he even gropes her boobs under the guise of checking her heart rate... seriously?! Why can't I do that in my job without the fear of getting sued... (and a black eye!)

Saving grace! Skin, skin n more skin! Good locales. A race tracks and cars. Nice designer outfits!

The babes provide good eye candy - at the end of the movie, it was difficult to judge who was better looking, a wet Bipasha or a wet Katrina! Tough choice indeed! ;-) Feel free to cast ur vote in the comments (multiple selections allowed). Sameera was wasted as was Johnny Lever. [As a friend put it - Sameera can't even play dumb properly] Ladies can pick between a shirtless Saif, a shirtless Akshaye or a fully clad Anil for ogling.

All the horse racing and the car chasing was lost in the stripping as the twists spun out of control! The mish-mash made the 2.5 hour movie feel like a 3.5 hour movie that came with a free headache. Really, thats all I have to say about the movie... Its not worth wasting any more brain power! The poor comedy killed most of the few brain cells I had left! (most of the few - see, there's your proof!)

2.5 / 5

!~~~ Makes heads turn ~~~!

When my gf made a comment that my Honda Accord looked "too executive", I decided it was time to change my wheels. Although I did like my Accord, it was indeed tad to comfy for my taste. Which is what started my hunt for a car. The criteria was quite simple. I wanted all the safety features of the Accord but in a sportier car that was also economical and reliable.

The search on google brought up 3 names - The MINI Cooper (those who have seen The Italian Job know what I mean), Volkswagen GTI (loved the fact that it came with a built in TURBO !!) and the Toyota Celica (loved its low profile, sleek shape and muscular styling.... the dials and the seats .... ok... I’ll stop now).

Search as I might, I could not get a Celica within my price range and if I did, the car was not in my color choice. When my birthday arrived, I decided that I was going to sell my Accord to put additional pressure on myself to make a decision. Having done that, I said to myself - If I’m going to be denied a Celica and have to pay high maintenance anyways, I’m gonna treat myself to a Merc or a Beemer!! Having said that, I went to the local car dealer and there.... Sitting demurely and yet commanding attention was a Honda. It felt quite at home with all the classy cars. As my love of Japanese cars is well known, I decided to go for a spin.

The first thing I noticed from the outside was the distinctive shape. It has a lot of curves and slopes in the hood, but as you progress towards the boot, the car gets more and more muscular and leaner. I guess the idea was to make people think that the car is a puny kitten, but when they take this pocket rocket up for a race, the boot is what they’ll see most of the times which will make them have new found respect for the vehicle!

The first thing I noticed on the interior was the inviting trim on the vehicle. Black cloth seats with red stitching is the theme of the vehicle. The dials have a white background with black letters and a red glow to them. The seats are meant to be comfortable and hugged my body well for aggressive cornering and driving comfort. The head rests have a hole - the kind you see in sports convertibles or in rally racers. Such is the attention to detail here, that the rally style shifter and the leather steering also have red stitching - like a base ball- to match the seats. The silver center console lends a touch of class to this sporty vehicle. Again, the door knobs are made to match the console and have a matt sliver finish to them. Full points to Honda for the interiors. They even have 3 cup holders in the front seats with the driver getting 2 - one on the left that pops in and out and another in the usual place below the center console; this was to help make the car comfy for left handers and for subtly saying "we are designing this to be a drivers car"!

The 2.0 liter iVTEC DOHC 16-valve 4 Cylinder with Continuously Variable Cam Timing has 3 distinct sounds to it - A low grunt in the 1.5K - 3K RPM range, A gentle purr in the 3k-4.5K range and a throaty Roarrrr in the 5-7K range!! The power delivery can be felt accordingly in each of the ranges. The thing I love the most about this engine is that it is very happy to redline!! In the initial days of owning my car, I loved revving it and feeling the surge of power propel the car at the whims of my right foot! It was a beast that needed to be tamed and we got along perfectly!

The iVTEC technology means that when you are not revving the engine you can get 26 MPG in the city and 30 MPG on the freeway. I get 24 in City and 28-29 on the freeway. If revving it, the fuel economy drops to 21-22.xx range, but the fun had while doing it more than makes up for the measley gas milage :-))

The engine generates 160 horses @ 6,500 RPM and can propel this beast to 60 MPH in 7.9 Secs!! This makes the Civic Si an under 20,000 Dollar vehicle that is an under 8 second car!!!! All this while looking good too! If the Civic’s your wife, you wont need a mistress!

The front suspension of the Civic is a MacPherson Strut design to allow room for a high-mounted steering box with longer steering arms for improved stability. The rear suspension is the double wishbone type biased toward handling. The suspension is calibrated toward a firm ride at the expense of comfort (again, this is a sports car). The longer steering arms for improved stability mean that you can take corners at insane speeds without going over the edge as I found out in the 1st week of driving it. I hit an on-ramp designed for 25 MPH at 50 MPH and the car was riding on 3 wheels, but the rubber didnt leave the road and the corner was conquered without a scratch! I got my money’s worth right there!

It comes with an electric power steering for better control and improved fuel economy. As you speed up, the computer reduces the power steering effort in one MPH increments up to 99 MPH. This is done to provide the best steering feel at highway speeds, while providing a light steering effort during parking maneuvers. Very intelligent and very effective.

Being a driver’s car, it comes only with a 5-speed manual tranny. An automatic option is not available in the Si version. The clutch is very light and the short throw shifter is rally inspired - this is a boon because the engine and the gear box are mated in a way that will require you to shift gears often in the city, but the Honda engineers have made shifting a breeze.

The car comes fully loaded and there is no other option available for this vehicle.

Now the bad - After an year of driving, the car feels under powered, especiallly in 1st gear. The 2.0 engine feels small and at highway speeds, you feel the need of an extra gear as the engine revs are very high at highway speeds. A 6-speed gearbox would have improved gas milage and will also be easy on the engine because the ideal cruise RPM should be 2.5K and not 3.5 K on the freeway. The car lost points only because of this little nag that is important to me.

The verdict on this car - It is a head turner for sure. What looks like a demure cat easily turns into a beast if you wish it to. The car will get you noticed as you arrive in style!

4.9/5 on style
3.9/5 on performance
4.5/5 on the X-factor