Sunday, April 5, 2009

How did Kate Beckinsale help iron my clothes! Movie Review: Underworld (2003)

Dark was the night and eerie was the atmosphere! The moon kept moving in and out of the clouds, its silhouette faintly visible from behind the thin ones. Playing hide and seek with the clouds, it came out from behind a particularly thick one, casting its silver light thru the bedroom window. It was in this brief moonlit moment that I first spotted her. She was standing on the edge of the bed, looking down with a serious expression on her lovely face. The mop of jet black hair cascading from her head was cut short, yet long enough to cover her eyes, which appeared closed. She would have fooled any other man, but not me. I could see that they were ever so slightly open. But it did not matter! With her keen olfactory senses, she could have sensed my presence from miles away! She stood coyly, flashing a lycra clad leg from beneath her long leather coat that was wrapped around her tight body like second skin. She held a gun pointing downwards from her left hand. It was clear she was not here to play.

"Do it!" she commanded. "Its such a boring job!" I replied. "Well, that's only if you're alone. Tonight, I'll be your company when you do it. Open up and pop it in!". Something told me not to argue with a woman holding a gun in her hand. So, I opened the buttons, first one, then the other. One more button and the thing slid out from the slot eager to receive that round shiny thing with a hole in the center. There was a slight purring sound.... (or was a whirring sound?) Another button here and there and we were all locked up n loaded! A faint music played from the speakers as the TV came to life with the menu of "Underworld" displayed on the telly! I pressed play on the dvd remote and I brought out a huge load of clothes to iron. It was going to be a long night ladies n gentlemen, for the movie is 121 minutes long!

Starring Kate Beckinsale, Scott Speedman, Michael Sheen, Kevin Grevioux, Bill Nighy, Underworld (2003) is directed by Len Wiseman. The movie is very cool and I liked that its complex story held my interest for the full 2 hours of playtime. Underworld is a tale of a long standing feud between the vampires and the lycans. The story is not your ordinary blood and gore tale of mindless killing. What makes it intriguing are intertwined plots of double cross and forbidden love.

For any modern day vampire/werewolf tale to hold my interest, the graphics have to be slick. This is where the movie scores its points. The lycans' transition from human form to a werewolf is pretty cool. It is accompanied with screaming n shirking, but its still nicely done for a horror movie. i.e. It is not at all cheesy like the beginning of this write up :D

The use of flashback adds to the mystery of the story. The flashbacks are not irritating, because they play an important part in the overall story. Beckinsale really has a penchant for such movies. She fits the bill perfectly to a T. Looking cool n coy with a deadpan expression on her face, she has the right look to play the part. Be it a vampire slayer Anna in Van Helsing or a vampire, Selene in the Underworld series, she has the right expression and the perfect amount of paleness to play the parts convincingly. She also has the bod to look cool in tight fitting lycra. Her fitness makes the action sequences very much believable on screen! (of course its all fake action and we know it very well, but it still has to look convincing at that moment, right?)

The head vampire Viktor, (played by Bill Nighy) is a particularly powerful character shown in the movie. It would take a lot of ruthlessness, power and intelligence to rule over an entire army of vampires and to keep them all under check. Viktor's character displays that power and intelligence very nicely in the movie.

I also liked the character of Raze in the movie (played by Kevin Grevioux). Raze's character is that of an evolved werewolf. He is a loyal, ruthless killer who can turn into a wolf at will. i.e. He need not wait for the moon to be full to change form. Choosing a big, burly, muscular guy for the part of killer werewolf was very clever as it makes the transition more seamless and yet, interesting.

Lucian, played by Michael Sheen, is another cool werewolf character. His character is vital to the story as it plays an important role in the feud between the lycans and the vampires. His character can pop bullets out of his head while healing. Pretty cool, ain't it!

I give the movie 4/5 because -
A) Its a vampire movie
B) It has good graphics
C) The story is not at all boring. Its a complex tale well told!
D) Kate Beckinsale helped me iron my clothes! How freaking cool is that! muhahahahahahaha !!
(Ok, it was because she looks pretty freakin cool in Lycra! That was just to satisfy the purists!)

Watch it so you can enjoy the 2nd movie Underworld:Evolution (2006). You can even start with the latest in the series - Underworld: Rise of the lycans (2009). Its a prequel to Underworld (2003).


Shayari said...

With two movies in a row, that was a very productive weekend ;-))

Aish hain!:)

Yword said...

definitely not my favourite genre bu wll keep it in mind.
fora moment i thought you were quoting the highwayman - poem by alfred noyes? but looks like kate beckinsale is no bess what with gun n all. but coy eh? you deciphered that through all the lycra and guns? :)
at least u got your shirts ironed.

eye-in-sty-in said...

Hi Shayari,
Yeh batao hw was UR weekend... lolz

Hi M,
You should have tried something closer to home. The opening was borrowed from a ghost story I used to read as a kiddo. Vikram and Betal. Lol. Bess she may not be, but she did play her part in me wearing ironed clothes :P

thanks for commenting.

Vee said...

Absolutely my kind of genre.. I love Vampire movies and yes if the graphics is good, it is added advantage. I saw Twilight of late but did not like it much.. The soul of Vampire-kind of flick was missing from it.. This one no doubt a fun watch..

Smita said...


Smita said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
couchpapaya said...

someone has a cru-ush :P

i cannot seem to separate underworld and van helsing in my mind, i did like both for the genre, just wish they were more memorable!!!

avdi said...

If you watched how did you iron? Or did you wind up with a bunch of burnt clothes? Why dont you wear lycra and do away with the ironing board altogether.

I would rather have Kate iron my clothes while I watched the movie. Ironing is one mean job I really hate. Thank god for the friendly neighbourhood Istriwalla

eye-in-sty-in said...

Hi Vee,
I liked twilight the movie, have not read the book (after CP's scathing revu, I feel I have to clarify... lol)... It was more of a teen romantic movie with a light vampire flavour to it... Ii would be unfair to other vampire movies to lable twilight as a vampire movie. This one you'll love!

And since ur's sucha fan, I'll keep this comment exclusively for ya! ... lol

eye-in-sty-in said...

Hi Smita,
What are you laughing at? Grrrrrrrrr !

Hi CP,
Hey, I'll be the 1st one to admit - I have a thing for strong and intelligent female characters! The lycra only helps! And if she helps iron my clothes, what more can one ask for ;-)

Underworld and Van Helsing are movies that one does not go out of their way to watch - but if they are showing somewhere and its convenient to watch 'em, they make for a decent entertainment.

In Underworld, Kate wears a plain black lycra, a la Carrie Ann Moss in Matrix... The difference being, Carrie's lycra was more shiner than Kate's. In Van Helsing Kate is wearing frilly blouse with a steel studded leather corset that highlights her slim waist. She also had on a red embrodiered wollen jacket that goes well with the colour of her lips (perhaps to woo Hugh Jackman).
There are other differences too - Underworld has Kate in the leading role and the creatures are different. The setting too is different. No, I'd say they are two completely different movies! What is wrong with you woman!! (lol) Could it be that they not memorable because their fan base is quite limited? or is the converse true? They have a limited fan base because they aren't memorable movies?... Since you bring up the conundrum, I'd like to retort with an example. Pirates of the Carribean was not memorable for me, yet I liked the movie and it was a much bigger hit, perhaps because of two reasons - Johnny Depp and a larger fan base!

eye-in-sty-in said...

Hi Ava,

I ironed just the way I watch movies with sub-titles, one eye on the board, the other on the broad! (sorry, went with the flow - no offense meant)

I tried wearing a lycra suit, they would not let me in at work! Dress code they say, I think they are just jealous coz no one else has it!

On baby! Kate would not be ironing my clothes - thats the laundry man's job after she wrinkles 'em up! (how do you get me to say such things in my blog?)

eye-in-sty-in said...

All those who will comment in the next few days will get a free werewolf bite... (courtsey of the approaching full moon) -->

Smita said...


avdi said...

one eye on the board and another on the broad.... he he he.

yaah, the guys at work are plaing jealous. I want to wear my capri tracks to work with sneakers n an ancient soft tee.. but the guys at work !

avdi said...

I was bitten by a dog once, n had to go thru painful bandaging and anti-rabies injections (in the arm thankfully) - so no more creature bites for me.

eye-in-sty-in said...

Hey Ava, Dog bites are soo yesterday! Werewolves and Vampires are the ones happening these days .. lol

Shayari said...

My weekend?Huh.. was a tiring one! Had to relocate to the other room. Thanks to the Renovation work in the PG.

lol @ the werewolf bites..

eye-in-sty-in said...

Sorry to hear u had to move - moving is not fun at all! And dont u laugh at the werewolf bite on a full moon day! Pay your obeisance or you will pay the price!


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