Showing posts with label improvement. Show all posts
Showing posts with label improvement. Show all posts

Sunday, November 20, 2022

Cheat codes I know now I wish I knew earlier

1. Use workouts to gain muscle, diet to burn fat and cardio to improve your overall health & longevity.

2. Eat a high protein diet comprised of whole foods for the best body composition.

3. When lifting weights use your mind to muscle connection to increase muscle contraction.

4. Upon waking drink water before coffee.

5. Delay coffee 1-2 hours upon waking. This lets cortisol clear out adenosine, which can lead to sustained energy into the afternoon.

6. Use your nose for smelling & breathing. Use your mouth for talking, tasting & eating.

7. Mouth breathing disrupts sleep, ruins oral health & can cause sleep apnea. Mouth taping at night helped me solve this.

8. Mouthwash is the biggest dental scam. Kills your oral microbiota. Avoid.

9. Avoid fluoride in your toothpaste. Use ones that have hydroxyapatite.

10. Sleep at the same times every day. Align your body with the rising & setting of the sun.

11. The 321 method for better sleep. No eating 3 hours before bed. No liquids 2 hours before. No screens 1 hour before.

12. If you look at screens at night wear bluelight blockers.

13. You sleep for 1/3 of your entire life. Learn how to optimize it and make it make it as awesome as possible.

14. Memory is fallible. When you have a good idea write it down immediately.

15. Your best ideas come in the shower, walking or in the gym. Keep a notepad ready.

16. Peel a boiled egg by rolling it around your plate for awhile until all the shells are cracked. This makes it easy to remove the complete shell in one shot.

17. Close the toilet bowl when flushing to avoid particles of filth sprouting up into your bathroom atmosphere.

18. The more you criticizes others the more you criticize yourself. If you want to judge yourself less judge others less.

19. Stay away from people who always complain. They are energy vampires.

20. Stay away from people who gossip. They are most likely gossiping about you.

21. Learn a martial art to increase discipline, confidence & release stress.

22. Seek rejection daily. This numbs you to the feeling. Also, you only get what you ask for.

23. Take complete ownership for every result in your life. The only constant in every result is you.

24. When someone is walking in your path look at their shoulder closest to you. 9 times out of 10 they will move out of the way.

25. Be in rooms where you're the dumbest person. Workout at gyms where you're the least fit person.

26. When you feel an emotion don't numb it. It'll only make it feel worse later. Feel it fully then let it go. Emotion is energy. We must let it pass.

27. You can tell a lot about someones character by how they treat service staff.

28. Money & alcohol amplify who a person is at their core.

29. When someone shows you their true colours believe them.

30. A few months a year go monk mode. Eliminate all distractions & vices and use that energy to build your health & business.

31. Who you choose as a partner will determine your level of peace, wealth & happiness.

32. Your perception is reality. If you want a better reality change your perception.

33. You'll never be as young as you are now. Do what you feel you're meant to do.

34. Your best decisions come from stillness. Stillness is amplified in nature & meditation.

35. You can only get stronger when you face problems in life. Embrace the fucking struggle.

36. Show up up, do the work & seek ways to grow. Do this every day & watch what happens.

37. Trust people who say "I don't know" more than the people who have all the answers.

38. Seek feedback from those in the arena. Not from the ones who are boo'ing from the cheap seats.

39. No one cares. Work harder.

40. Instead of giving your kids what you wish you had teach them things you wish you knew.

41. Keep a small circle. It's better to go narrow & deep than wide & shallow.

42. True wealth is about being physically & financially healthy while living in a household full of love.

That's it. Life's a game. Collect experience points, crush your enemies & explore. Hope these cheat codes help you in your journey.

If you got value out this thread:

1. Follow @FitFounder on Twitter for more of these. 
You can read this thread here


Friday, October 28, 2022

How to give feedback the right way

How to have difficult conversations the right way.

For the longest time, I struggled with giving direct feedback.

I felt I was being too harsh, I felt they will feel hurt, they might not like me, they will confront me and I will not know how to defend.

A million things used to go on in my head.

Until, I read the book 'Radical Candor'.

In this brilliant book by Kim Scott, Kim explains 4 types of feedback and how only one of them is effective.

To explain that, she uses two determinants.

One, do you care personally about the person you are giving feedback to - whether your friend, your relative, your colleague, whosoever!

Second, are you direct with that person or not? Or do you twist and turn or sugar coat your feedback?

Basis these 2 determinants, Kim showed the four types of feedback.

Let's try and understand them:


Bottom Right Quadrant:
If you challenge the person directly, but you do not care for the person - then that is obnoxious aggression!

This is when you are harsh, you are rude, you are not being helpful.

We all know how that feels, because we have felt it.

The end result of such an approach is instant defensiveness. With little change in the person we gave the feedback to.

Bottom Left Quadrant:
If you do not care about the person but you do not challenge directly either, instead sugar coat and pretend to be all nice and warm - that is manipulative insincerity.

Most toxic relationships lie here.
This results in mistrust and again, no change!

Top Left Quadrant:
If you do care about the person, but do not challenge directly, it is ruinous empathy.

It results in ignorance (people do not even know what to fix, if at all to fix anything) and thus no change.

This is what I was guilty of, for the longest time!

Top Right Quadrant:
It is ONLY when you challenge directly AND you care personally about the person you are giving feedback - that it is Radical Candor.

RC leads to instant change and needless to say, profound in nature!

The book hit me hard.

Because now I had a way of managing my guilt of being harsh towards someone I cared for.

So today, before giving any feedback to any of my known ones, I ask these 3 questions:

Question 1: Am I saying this because I feel anger or frustration?

In hindsight - none of those remarks ever helped.

It just made them more defensive or exercise authority if they could.
Now, I ask a different question:
“What is it that they know that I do not?”
That helps me see their side and approach it from that direction.

Question 2: Do I want the other person to truly win, or would I feel happy watching them lose?

I found myself in situations where I wanted the person to lose, so that I could pin point their mistakes, go one up on them and thus establish authority the next time I said something.

Today, I make sure that I want them to win by whatever I say.

For ex:
"You do not even know why I am angry" - is an unfair statement to make.
It makes it sound like you WANT the other person to forget, and use that as an excuse to remind them of their failure.

Question 3: Will this feedback help them or help me?

Things that I said which, in hindsight helped only me and not them, was not feedback.
It was just my need to express myself.
The chart above helped me a lot.

I am most guilty of ruinous empathy.

It’s my biggest weakness because I still fall in that trap.

Of wanting to help myself (they should feel I am a nice person), than helping them!

I have come to believe that most relationships falter because they never engage in Radical Candor.

I hope this helped you realize where you could be going wrong.

Or, where someone you know could be going wrong and you can now, through Radical Candor, help them see it :)

Candor is a compliment.
It implies equality.
It is how true friends talk.

- Peggy Noonan



You can read this thread on Twitter by Ankoor Warikoo here